We All Breathe in the Beginning - Chapter 1.1

Dwindling fading and an eerie luminescence fills my darkening soul. Gritty sand lay beneath my old brown flip flops as I gaze at my reflection in the oceans shimmering surface.This time of year I know the water is colder than normal. Do I dare step into it's cold embrace? Or should I just walk away and pretend nothing ever happened here? I stood here just months ago when Ryan proposed to me.

Tears roll down my cheeks in silent torment smearing my mascara down my face and I don’t want them to stop.

“Where are you now?” My breath comes out in puffs against the cool air as I talk to myself. “Will I find you again?” My voice cracks and I fall to my knees weeping. “Sometimes I still hear you calling for me from some distant place I can’t get to. I miss you so much.” Bringing my hands to my eyes I cry harder trying to remember all the good times, all the thrills and all the sweet kisses we shared.

Flashes of the memories play behind my eyelids like tempting devils as I try to grasp a hold of what once was. I wrapped my arms around myself wishing I could feel him again. His inviting smile, warm hands, and welcoming arms; everything about him was gone. I have nothing left of him but the memories I will always cherish.

It was a day like any other with my friends out on the beach. The ocean licked at the shore by our feet as we gossiped away. I didn't even think that anything special would happen. Sure there was a bonfire planned for later that night, but I was highly debating about leaving. Well that was until a certain guy caught my eye.

I didn't know who he was, but I wanted to. I would watch as he chatted away with his friends. Mesmerized by his grey blue eyes as they shimmered in the sunlight, and how his hair slightly hung in his face. The slight curvature of his lips; I couldn't help but wonder what they would feel against mine.

The thing is, he must have noticed me while I kept glimpsing at him. My heart raced as he walked our way. His smile shown brightly in the dimming sky.
"Hey, I'm Ryan. My friends and I were wondering if you and well your friends would like to join us over at the fire pit?" His voice was like music to my ears, deep and utterly velvety which plucked away at my heart strings.
"I'm Lucy and yea we'd love to." I tried my best not to sound as shy as I felt but it come out in a small quiet tone that I was glad that he could hear it so I wouldn't have to repeat myself.
"Great." He walked back over to his friends; following behind him my friends and I giggled away like giddy little school girls.

Sitting down next to him I felt as if there were a million butterflies fluttering around in my stomach. I swallowed hard hoping I'd be able talk and not sound like an idiot. Taking in a deep breath I attempted to slow my erratic heartbeat. Plastering on a smile I gazed into his eyes.

I don't know what it was about him exactly that made me feel all queasy, but I liked it. I was hooked from the mere look of him, and I knew he was someone I'd want to end up spending my life with right than and there. It's crazy I know. Just barely meeting and feeling something so strong, I just hoped he was feeling the same things I was.